Dry mouth

She lights a cigarette
and inhales one lung full of smoke
can feel it seeping between the spaces in her lungs
airways bearing a sickness and a medicine
Her mouth is dry
but she doesn’t mind so much
She doesn’t have anything to say anyway
at least nothing that won’t just seep between the spaces
So she keeps quiet
and inhales another fist full of relief
anything to avoid punching the glass on her bathroom wall
and breaking even more
her image of herself


No Filter

There is only a stifling silence
only the slightest clicks of teeth
from mouths opening and closing
whether there are any words left to say
or if it is even worth it
How much worth do words have in a world where there are filters?
Hiding behind the shades of eye-blinding vibrance
we take comfort in the way the colors make us something else
Vulnerability is a fool’s battle strategy
they say it will only leave you hurting
they say it will leave you gasping for your life
fearing for your belongingness in this universe
They never tell you how it reminds you of everything you have to be thankful for
that it shows you all the more how wonderful this place we call life is
that sometimes the moment you let yourself be open to suffering
is the moment you find salvation
Sometimes the filters
will only get in your way
so drop the filters
and listen
to the clicking of teeth and tongue
and the exhale of air
as it attempts to convey this world

Longing and Losing

Honey I still see
the stars shine in the sky
each night
And I still wish for the roads
to lead me back
The sofa creaks
on one side these days
and the dust lingers there
the same way it does on the half-made bed
when the sunlight streams through the window
The phone rings sometimes
and sometimes I pick it up
and strike a conversation
about you, or the weather
or the time
but most days I’m afraid they’ll ask for you
Someone else already asked for you
and you left
And that same night
I left myself sitting on the bar
drinking a beer I no longer taste
smoking a cigarette that’s no longer mine
and playing a song that I no longer have the words for


Remember, that the Earth was thought to be the center of the universe
but was found out to merely revolve around a sun
A sun that is only part of a bigger space where there is a center lost somewhere in the middle of all of this
How funny it is that the center of the universe doesn’t seem as relevant as the things that lie within its ever extending boundaries
It is only the universe because it continues to encompass more and more
This is its existence
much like ours
what a life it is, to live it loving others
this is how we love ourselves
this is how we live
and how we peacefully die